How Not to Buy Two Desks in an On-line Auction

How not to buy two desks in an on-line auction? 

It is incredibly difficult.

I've already tracked down the missing bale pull.

Only bid on one.

I did not and wound up with two very nice desks in one day.

My recent auction experience is both amusing and educational
so why not share it? Plus some relevant design history to boot? 

Who doesn't love a good story about someone else's foibles? 

And everyone loves design history.

Yes, you do.

For the record, I did not wake up one morning and announce,

"I will bid on two desks today."

I'm far more disciplined and purposeful than that! No, a desk was part of a larger plan formulated last summer when I decided it was time to redo our daughter's 25 going on 26-year-old little girl bedroom, aka

The Shrine

The Time Capsule

The Pink Room

Our daughter's rescue dog, Pumpkin, on bed.
Toy dog, about to be pounced on, on floor.

and transform it into an elegant and sophisticated office/guest room. My heart was set on fabrics I previously proposed to a client.

Wow. I might be on trend.
I think the greens are close to Greenery, Pantone's 2017 COTY.
I love the dove-colored Greek Key cut velvet.
l-r: Elizabeth from Schumacher, Lawrence Plaid and Meander Velvet from Anna French

And this sisal wallpaper.

Cholla Sisal, color Smoke, from Anna French.

A desk is the key element that makes an office an office. I did not have one but knew what I wanted.

Elegant. Sophisticated. Gorgeous. Black.

Like this. Exactly like this.
Nothing else would do.

Design by Alexa Hampton.
Photo by Linda Pakravan.

An antique Directoire-style ebonized demilune desk by Maison Jansen. French.

Love, want and need all happily aligned. Sigh.

Small catch. Phenomenally expensive. Drat.

Drat is a good word to use in public. I learned it from my ladylike neighbor and good friend. Actually, I uttered far worse but I was alone in my office where occasional swearing is not frowned upon.

Dismayed but not despondent, I consoled myself with my next favorite French fantasy, daydreaming that Cary Grant and I are strolling the Seine.

Red is not my color but I would definitely look good with Cary.

Which was an excellent reminder that the French are not the only curvy desk makers. The Brits! Like this Carlton House Desk in Highclere Castle's Library.

Highclere Castle, aka Downton Abbey.

Robert and Isis hard at work at the Carlton House desk in Downton Abbey's library.

Why is it called a Carlton House desk instead of a Highclere Castle, Downton Abbey's real-life location, desk? The short version:

In the late 1700s, the Prince of Wales lived in London's Carlton House. While in residence, he ordered a desk similar to the one Hugh Bonneville toiled at in Downton Abbey. Did the Prince have it made for his personal use? Was it a gift for a member of his entourage? The answer to these fascinating questions? Lost to time.

The Prince of Wales, future George IV
The Prince was promoted in 1811 to Prince Regent
and hit the glass ceiling upon his final promotion to George IV in 1820.

But to this very day, a desk with a rounded back and a writing surface encircled by cubbies and drawers is known as a Carlton House desk.

1stdibs

More interesting history. Parliament was not amused by the Prince's vastly over budget reno of Carlton House, which entailed lavish furnishings and exquisite furniture, including desks. Proof positive of the following key points:

1. Budget overruns are not an American invention.
2. Renovations always cost more than originally planned.

Number 3 is specific to me: 

     3. There are far more Carlton House desks than ebonized Jansen demilunes so the law of supply and demand should work in my favor.

The supply part of Number Three is true because an online search for an ebony (or black lacquer, I'm not totally picky) Carlton House desk took all of two nanoseconds.

Nice. I can work with this, sans the chair.

Holy Cow! Listed for $10,500 
a Maitland-Smith Carlton House Desk 
but includes chair, on 1stdibs 
So much for the law of supply and demand.
Hate it when I'm so, so wrong.

Local auction houses were next in the quest for a black, curvy, but not ten thousand dollar desk.

Sourcing locally is admirable but I'd be lying if I claimed that was my intent. No, shipping cross country or across the pond

Skinner
I like this painting, it has a somewhat primitive feel. Love the blue. I didn't bid on it.

significantly diminishes the buying power of my desired investment level (I dislike the word budget).

August melted by as I trolled local auctions. Finally, Luck! A Carlton House desk in a Skinner online auction. Also a Maitland-Smith, same maker as 1stDibs' $10,000 (but chair is included) black lacquer desk.






You noticed the catch. Always a catch. Desk is neither ebony nor black lacquer. It is ivory. In fact, ivory leather. Tooled ivory leather.

Ebony, not IVORY, living happily in my office/guest room... was not the song playing in my head.

Library of Congress

At this point, it is fair to reveal that I was not my client that day. If I had been I would have reminded self/client that it is in no way possible to give ivory leather an ebonized finish!

One of my daughter's fears: her mother is becoming a crazy orchid lady.

So I placed 2 modest bids on the Carleton House and a second desk, my backup plan because I was so sure I would be outbid on the ivory Carleton House desk. You guessed it, I was not outbid on either.

Bidding only on the one item of your heart's desire dramatically reduces the chances of owning two. Unless you are very disciplined, I recommend having your designer on hand to advocate for sanity and keep you on track with your desired financial investment goal (aka budget). 

In addition to being objective, designers are good with numbers. How so? Let's say there's a desk or painting you covet/love in an upcoming auction. You've allocated $600 total including taxes, shipping, buyers premium. Your designer will work that number backward to arrive at your high bid and hold you to it. For example:

385.00      HIGH BID
  38.50      buyer's premium, 10% for this example
  26.46      Sales Tax, we have 6.25% here in Massachusetts
150.00      desk shipping
599.96      TOTAL

Clearly, we have a lot more buying power if we don't have to ship large items or live in a state with no sales tax.

But I do love desk #1. It is now living happily in our living room.



The drawers and cubbies are fun.

As the Keno Brothers always say, you can't fake this patina.

And nicely lined with marbleized paper.

I wonder how long it will take Mr. P to fill them with batteries and pens. Mr. P is a summa cum laude grad of the You Can Never Have Too Many Batteries or Pens School.

Any fun auction experiences you'd be willing to share?

Thanks for reading,
Linda Pakravan

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